when to be me is both a blessing and a curse... 😞

Sometimes I sit quietly and ask myself, what did I do to deserve this weight? I move with care. I choose honesty over shortcuts. I give love without keeping score. I try to be soft in a world that rewards hardness. Yet it feels like I am always the one learning lessons the hard way.

I watch others walk freely while I carry storms I never created. I fix what I didn't break. I apologize for things that were never my fault. I stay strong because I don't know how to fall apart.

And it makes me wonder, is being good an invitation to be tested?

I don't regret who I am. I don't regret choosing kindness. But some nights, the weight feels heavier than my hope.

To my precious Praghathi Vaahini, A note from Amma to you, if one day I'm not here.

To My Dearest Daughter

,

I want you to carry this with you always: your voice matters. You are allowed to ask questions, to feel deeply, to make mistakes, and to learn at your own pace. You don’t have to have all the answers, and you don’t have to rush. Life is a journey, not a checklist, and your heart is wise enough to guide you.

Love—real love—should never hurt, scare, or humiliate you. It should lift you up, make you feel safe, and remind you of your worth. Whenever you feel misunderstood or alone, pause and remember how I see you—with pride, with gentleness, and with unwavering belief in who you are. That love is not just mine; it lives inside you now, and it travels with you wherever you go.

You don’t have to be perfect. You don’t have to be strong all the time. Some days you will stumble, some days you will cry, and some days you may even doubt yourself. That is okay. Be honest, be gentle with yourself, and trust your heart. Those are the things that will carry you further than any achievement ever could.

Always remember that I am proud of you—not for what you accomplish, but for the person you are becoming. Your kindness, your courage, your curiosity, and your heart—these are the things that truly matter.

Hold this close, my darling, and know that no matter where life takes you, my love goes with you, always and unconditionally.

With all the love in my soul,

Amma. 🫂🤗😘

UNCONDITIONAL ❤

If you really want to love a woman, never get married to her. If you really want to adore a man, escape as far away from him as possible. Then you will always love. 

But if you want to crash the whole love-affair, get married, the sooner the better. Go for a honeymoon, and by the time the honeymoon is finished, everything is finished. Suddenly one morning you look at the woman: she is an ordinary woman.

Have you heard the old story? A princess found a frog, and the frog said, "Lady, I have been cursed, and for five thousand years I have remained a frog. If you take me with you and if you allow me to sleep with you, in your bed, by the morning I will become a beautiful prince." 

You must have heard... these types of stories are there.

And the princess brought the frog, and in the morning he became a beautiful prince.

But reality is just the opposite: You bring a beautiful prince; in the morning he becomes a frog! Every prince turns into a frog in the end. And then you are puzzled: "What happened? What went wrong?"

Nothing went wrong; the frog is a frog. The prince was your idea, it was your wish-fulfillment. You were wanting to have a prince, so you had him. You were longing, you were projecting, you were dreaming.

—Osho—

The Path of Love

Ch #6: The Inner Trinity

am in Buddha H

when all the efforts go to waste. 💔

If there is a word that can describe exactly what last night felt like when she said. "Maa, that cake you made was ugly, next time please buy one. And she continued 'I miss the Elsa cake that atte bought,the one you made was really ugly'..

That one thing I wanted to teach her..effort over money matters more...'

Felt Like the Universe betrayed me once again'... 💔

And you are forgiven...💔

I saw how he lied...💔

embracing pain and heart break

I missed him a lot yesterday. I remembered how I chose to change many things about myself when it comes to him. For him to like me. For him to feel truly loved by me. To feel blessed for having each other. Nothing worked the way we both wanted. It was all a waste. I lose myself for a long time. I thought it was ok to let your shield down for the person you are married to. Just to have everything taken for granted in the end. But thats okay.., maybe it was only meant to be that way. Maybe i wouldnt have left if he didnt hurt me that much. Maybe we were hurting each other so much because separation was the divine intervention. Now that i feel safe loving him from a distance. Now that he dont get to abuse my love in the name of marriage. I still do love him, and i will always love him ..although it no longer make sense. He had all of me. Except he did not feel the same. 💔

-18/9/20-The birth of rhe meaning of my life-💞💞

Before leaving to hospital...contraction 5 mins apart since 2pm (17/9/20)

Labor pain started at 12am (18/9). Cervix just opened about 2cm.Was told that there is no bed left,there had to sit out and wait on chair.(moment of despair)😣😣😣

Little princess born at 8:01am after 18hrs of labor ; vacuum assisted normal delivery

#

Discharged on 19/9/20

-Home Sweet Home-

😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😘😘😘😘😘🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗

You see the glow dude??? Well,thats not a face of a victim. I dont play victim. Thats a face of a survivor. Im a SURVIVOR, and so should be the women of next generation. How you want to label yourself is your problem. 

Little precious on its way....🤗😍😘

Mommy is starting to have instict already...now time to face the one special phase to see and hold my world in my arms.😍

Goodbye.

நீ என்னை விட்டு நிரந்தரமாக போகலாம்.

எல்லா வாசலின் கதவுகளையும் நான் உனக்காகவே திறந்துவிட்டிருக்கிறேன்.

என்னிடம் இருந்து உனக்கு என்ன தேவைப்படுகிறதோ... 

அவைகளையும் எடுத்துக்கொண்டு போ.... 

ஆனால் என் நினைவுகளை மட்டும் விட்டுப்போ....

ஒரு போதும் என்னிடம் திரும்பி வர நினைக்காதே...

நான் திருந்தி வாழ நினைக்கிறேன். 

உனக்கும் எனக்கும் இடையிலான தவிப்பையோ... அந்தரங்கங்களையோ 

அதன் ஆதாரங்களையோ யாரிடமும் காண்பித்து அனுதாபம் வாங்காதே... 

அது உன்னையே உருக்குலைய செய்யும். 

எனக்கு தற்சமயம் ஒரு வருத்தமுமில்லை உன்னோடு வாக்குவாதப்பட விருப்பமுமில்லை 

உன் சுகந்திரத்தை அடைவதற்கு ஒரு போதும் பயப்படாதே...

நான் அதற்கு தடையுமில்லை...

நாட்கள் கடந்த பின்னர் என் ஞாபகம் உனக்கு வராமலிருப்பதற்காக 

இப்பவே வேறோர் விடையத்தில் அக்கறைப்படு.

மற்றவர்களை கவருவதற்கு உன்னிடம் நிறைய இருக்கிறது 

அதற்காக உன்னை விலை கொடுத்து வாங்க அனுமதிக்காதே...

நான் உன்னை நம்பியதுபோல் நீ யாரையும் நம்பி ஏமாராதே .. 

விரும்பியவர்களிடம் நடிக்காமல் முகத்துக்கு முன் சந்தேகப்படு.

என்னோடு இருந்த நாட்களில் நீ என்மீது செலுத்திய அன்புக்கும் அரவனைப்புக்கும் நன்றிகள் 

துக்கங்களில் இருந்து நீ இலகுவில் வெளிவருவாய்" - 

ஆதலால் என் மரணத்துக்காகவேனும் உன்னிடம் இருந்து...

ஒரு துளி கண்ணிரேனும் செலவாகாது. 

என்னிடம் திரும்பி வரமாட்டாய் என்பதை முழுமையாக நம்பித்தான் 

உன்னை அனுப்புகிறேன் good bye 

https://www.facebook.com/1401968666700245/posts/2823789247851506/?extid=BdyRre5NX7YbFwpC&d=null&vh=e

My precious looking like her daddy...a blessing in disguise....mommy will love you till end of time, unconditionally  also from the place of dad. I promise.🤗😘😘😘

How it all ended for good...😏

Narcisstic Personality Disorder